Three Conversations: First Step in Managing Mental Health
When I was first diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder I actually didn’t give it much credence. I had not studied the illness, or much about mental health in general, because I was raised to sweep it all under the rug. Growing up in an evangelical church, specifically a very judgmental congregation, seemed to exacerbate the manifestation of my disorder. The constant sentiment of “you’ll never be good enough to go to Heaven,” was more than my mood swings could handle.
From a young age I was always complimented on my energy level and creativity. I’m a planner, an executor of all things task-oriented. I spent a great deal of time bossing my cousins around, spearheading some outdoor game project, often with the demand, “I won’t play if you don’t do it my way.” Yes, I frustrated people with my overbearing and manic leadership style even way back then.
When I finally experienced my first major episode as an adult, I had no idea what to do or how to function. I hid myself in a small house in the woods and that became my residence for over three years. I worked my high pressure/high responsibility job every day and then came home and crashed. Fortunately for me, friends recognized that I was struggling and one in particular knew how to intervene.
Over the next eighteen months or so I battled to recover from this major depressive episode and I learned a great deal about my disorder and about myself. Knowledge truly is power and I recommend if you suffer from a mental illness that you immediately educate yourself through websites, articles, and professional help.
I developed a strategy for managing my illness over time and it has kept me accountable. I still struggle with both manic and depressive episodes and I always will, but now I have a structure in place that I hope will save my life when I reach the darkest of places.
My first step was to talk with God. Even though I felt that the local church let me down, it never weakened my spiritual relationship with God. I have always known He is there as a steadying force. I talk to Him as much as I can and even when I don’t feel like forming the words, I sit in silence and let the Holy Spirit do His job. I’ve never been able to achieve anything in life without God’s help, so managing my mental illness is no different. Jesus has compassion for us. The New Testament says, “Jesus wept.” He knows that we experience various emotions and He also knows which of mine are uncontrollable by myself.
Secondly, I talk to my family. I am so blessed with a support system of family and friends. The people who constantly surround me and love me unconditionally are a lifeline. In order to assure accountability for my actions, I talk to my loved ones every day and keep them abreast of my moods, worries, and actions. Although the love is unbreakable, they are not afraid to call me out on bad behavior and to help me to realize the heartache that some symptoms can cause.
Finally, professional help is necessary. Recent studies show that those who suffer from Bipolar and long term depression can expect to see a reduction in life span between nine to twenty years. Reading this information startled me. There have been several times over the years that I took myself off my psych meds. As dangerous as it seems, I was manic at the time and felt on top of the world always bearing the attitude, “I can do it on my own.” I’ve endured horrible trial and error on meds, brutal side effects, and a humbling hospital stay. Still, the only way to manage a mental health illness is to see a professional, regardless of your final decision on a treatment plan.
It is necessary to hold three conversations on a regular basis. our Father, family, and doctors are the catalysts for successful management of mental health. Loneliness leads to hopelessness and hopelessness to poor choices. Almost all untreated mental health issues lead to the destruction of someone’s life. People self-medicate, harm or kill themselves or others, and lose loved ones and jobs. I always tell myself that I have to do everything I can to avoid allowing Bipolar Disorder to define my future.
Rob
